I’ve got your picture, I’ve got your picture. I’d like a million of them all ’round my cell. I want a doctor to take your picture. So I can look at you from inside as well. You’ve got me turning up and turning down, I’m turning in, I’m turning ’round.

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Give me back my broken night. My mirrored room, my secret life. It’s lonely here, There’s no one left to torture. Give me absolute control. Over every living soul. And lie beside me, baby. That’s an order.

We’ve had listens all over the US and also in Canada, Ireland, Finland and Sweden. HOT DAMN

Montrose Beach flooded as I’ve never seen before

Lake Michigan water levels: ‘They’ve been higher than this before, but not by much’; meanwhile lakes Superior and Erie set to break May records

After a snowy and soggy April, water levels on all five Great Lakes rose by more than a half-foot and are forecast to remain well above their average this summer, with two anticipated to break record highs, according to the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers.

Between April and May, each of the lakes rose at least 6 inches and stands more than a foot above its monthly average. Lakes Michigan and Huron, measured together because they are connected at the Straits of Mackinac, rose 9 inches in a month and are more than 2 feet above their monthly average.

Monday 5/13/2018 59 degrees and cooler by the lake but did 15 miles after work just because…


Hello Ironhead my old friend. So good to see you again.

5/14/2019 Did 48 miles after work and got home at dark

Mark is in Japan, Korea and Japan again this week that fucker. Saturday he’s supposed to go to  Tower Records Shibuya and hopefully pick me up some swag. I’d love a Japanese Tower Records shirt. Tower Records Japan has eighty-three stores found throughout Japan. The store in Shibuya is considered to be one of the biggest CD retail outlet stores in the world. It occupies nine floors worth of CDs and books.

タワーレコード オンライン、映像、本、グッズの通販

After work I met up with Max and Brian which would be the first time the three of us 2  be together in one space in years. I chose Flaco’s Tacos in Edgewater since it was near Max and on the way home for me on my bike ride from work. HUGE mistake! The so called ‘one of the top 10 margaritas in Chicago” were a frozen premixed concoction and the fish taco was so bland I could not finish the damned thing. Everything was overpriced and I should have known being that the entire staff were young 20-ish white kids. Max and Brian both had bowls and complained how bland they were and there was barely a hint of cilantro. Never again. It was nice to bring the Tres Amigos together again.

I got home late and it was dark and I had my bike lights but they were not yet mounted. I came home and worked on some updates for the PodCast and went to bed not knowing that I once again would be living alone. (a blessing) I suppose he’s using this email I sent him Sunday as his excuse to be butthurt:


Now that the RodeCaster and all mics are set up for studio in the dining room and I am liable for all of it (very expensive) I need to make the space off limits. So please don’t put coats bags or anything else in the area or use chairs etc.  It’s just to play it safe to insure no accidents or anything like that happens. This also goes for any of my guests not involved in the production of the program. 

Mark the guy who had been renting the guest room bailed while I was at work Wednesday. He was working in Chicago on a 10 month contract. No notice, no message, not a word he just took what he could with him and bailed. I know he wasn’t happy with the direction of my PodCast which I told him all winter long what I’d be addressing. He’s actually a SJW in his own right so maybe he was offended. He was also unhappy that I didn’t like picking up and cleaning up after him and  was very displeased I asked him to wash his dishes before he went to bed, he called me a fucking psycho and  a control freak as a result. I took it with a grain of salt being after all he’s a 49 year old man that can’t even flush his won shit or take his hat off when seated in a restaurant. All in all he’s a nice guy but all in all must be used  to a more carefree way of life. Everyone knows I’m a clean freak and have a very organized home. At least he cleaned up his room and didn’t leave a mess. I wish him the best.

I’m getting right to work on the guest room today!

Sunday I’m making Chicago style hot dogs for guest of the show and the following week a BBQ which I hope to tie into the recording. Big things are happening fast and I’m going to being doing remotes over the summer. The Looney Bin, Wild West Town and Tac Quick are my first victims. 

I know your soul is not tainted. Even though you’ve been told so. Can you hear the rumble? Can you? I can hear the rumble that’s calling? I can feel the thunder that’s breaking in your heart. I can see through the scars inside you.

There is some great “keyboard warrior” aka “SJW” talk on the 5/12/2019 Mothers Day episode of the MKULTRASOUND PodCast. We can’t make this stuff up.

The first episode using the RodeCaster!

Ty and I have another PodCast in the can. Bill is doing some edits and I will let you know when it’s up. More photos coming as well.

Next week Nicole Torianna Nichole Bodie and Damon Christopher.

Creating an episode on my end is getting easier as I’ve learned the basics of the RodeCaster Pro. However for the 4 episodes we’ve produced in 3 weeks there is a lot of post production work involved that has taken both mark and Bill hours to tighten up and do some very talented editing work and the show would not exist in its present form without their hard work and dedication.

Yesterday Ty and I did an abbreviated show just the two of us and introducing her as my sidekick sitting in Echo’s chair. We went in armed with some good material and anecdotes. It should be up sometime later today once Bill is finished with adding a few final touches. Mark was kind enough to call and check in from Japan after we wrapped recording. 

Friday I got in touch with another MINISTRY alum in regards to coming on the show and he’s game so I imagine we’ll get him on in June after my return from IOWA.

Louis Svitek musician and former guitarist for a number of bands including Zoetrope, M.O.D., Ministry, Pigface, Mind Funk, The Hollow steps and Project .44. His work can also be found in many movie soundtracks such as The Matrix and Blue Hill Avenue.

Svitek and partner Ryan McGuire founded their own recording studio and independent record label, “WuLi Records”, in Chicago, IL. WuLi Records is responsible for discovering Chicago’s acts such as The Redd, 2 Unique, Young Inno, The Waking, and American Idol 2010 winner Lee DeWyze. Prior to Idol, Louis Svitek was part of the Lee DeWyze Band that also included Ryan McGuire and Jeff Henderson.

It won’t be long now till we can do remotes and I have a few locations already in mind. I’d like to do one from Tac Quick on a Saturday night. After next weeks show I think we’ll do a fun filled multi guest Rock n Roll BBQ/PodCast Memorial Day weAkend. A who knows what the hell could happen clusterfuck on personalities. 

I hope everyone enjoys our latest effort and I appreciate your support. We not only have listeners across the US but have tracked listeners in Sweden and Ireland. WOW!

Deep in you eyes, you show the world your broken heart. It tears me apart, I should have realized from the start. But I can’t understand, how I got to feeling like I do. I just know that I do, and I’ve got to tell you soon

Chad Imler

Billie Pulera

Dave Lawson

 Brock Betz

Punky Meadows

 Frank DiMino

You know it’s a good night when you get a friends white strat backstage to get signed by his guitar hero Punky Meadows and your surrounded by good rock n roll friends. When Electric Revolution took the stage Cassie and I were down near the front. The singer Dave Lawson called out “Where’s Alex Zander” and I waved and then he asked “And the beautiful Cassandra?” and I pointed ot Cassie taking pictures. Bob Hoeksema sat toward the back and took in the show and 2 songs in Andrew the personal assistant to ANGEL’s front-man Frank DiMino signaled me backstage and asked me for a favor. I had to run out and missed the rest of the set.

Originally the rhythm guitar player Danny Farrow Anniello for ANGEL who has a major crush on Cassie and who doesn’t was supposed to have us on the guest list. I got Bob on Electric Revs list. Danny didn’t have us on the list so Cassie got in through him and Brock Betz my favorite guitar player now walked me in as his guest. So things went well and soon people were buying me drinks and Andrew hung out with us before he went to the soundboard to run sound for ANGEL. I saw some old and new friends including Adam Becvare whose guitar we got signed and Lainie Levinson a true die hard rock n roller know well throughout the Chicago scene. I ran into Chip Z’Nuff backstage and by the end of a very well picked set list was wiped out. I was invited to a party but opted to have Bob take me home. I heard from Cassie who went backstage and didn’t get home till around 530AM.

How I used to lived this life 7 nights a week I don’t know. i can’t even make it to an after party anymore. But I do like to occasionally dabble back into my rock n roll life.

Earlier that day I was up early and at the doctors office to get my allergy situation taken care of. I now have to take allergy meds everyday for the next 3 months. But at least I’ll have my voice back to normal. I stopped by Asia on Argyle to buy some noodles and peek into Qideas for new cactus plans which won’t be restocked till tomorrow. At home I got back to work on writing for this weekends podcast and after changing clothes took the train to Chinatown and walked over to Reggies.

Saturday morning the RodeCaster Pro arrived via overnight mail from Baton Rouge and as Mark was in the air on his way to Japan I went to the library to print up the notes for Ty and I to read on the PodCast.

Thursday night I have a dinner date and we’re already planning to see Nicole Bodie to perform Saturday night. Asian and 4’10.

Brock, AZ and Andrew

Brock, AZ, Andrew and Cassie

Punky Meadows signing Adams white strat

 The RodeCaster Pro has arrived

It was not even 7 AM and I was already hammering out notes for the next show and still haven’t even made my bed. If you know me you know how I am about making my bed first thing. Even when I was crippled.

If you want to change the world start by making your bed. Or somethin’.


“Make Your Bed”
by Admiral William H. McRaven

Every morning in basic SEAL training, my instructors, who at the time were all Vietnam veterans, would show up in my barracks room and the first thing they would inspect was your bed. If you did it right, the corners would be square, the covers pulled tight, the pillow centered just under the headboard and the extra blanket folded neatly at the foot of the rack — that’s Navy talk for bed.

It was a simple task — mundane at best. But every morning we were required to make our bed to perfection. It seemed a little ridiculous at the time, particularly in light of the fact that were aspiring to be real warriors, tough battle-hardened SEALs, but the wisdom of this simple act has been proven to me many times over.

If you make your bed every morning you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a small sense of pride, and it will encourage you to do another task and another and another. By the end of the day, that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed. Making your bed will also reinforce the fact that little things in life matter. If you can’t do the little things right, you will never do the big things right.

And, if by chance you have a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made — that you made — and a made bed gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better.

If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.

Sent at 12:50 AM by Rona Roughheart who understands my Beavis and Butthead sense of humor. She’s currently on tour with Curse Mackey and My Life With The Thrill Killl Kult

There’s a killer on the road
His brain is squirmin’ like a toad
Take a long holiday
Let your children play
If you give this man a ride
Sweet family will die
Killer on the road, yeah

And the way I feel tonight, I could die and I wouldn’t mind. And there’s something going on inside. Makes you want to feel makes you want to try. Makes you want to blow the stars from the sky.

It’s is so satisfying to have yet another creative outlet to express myself within again. I could never imagine living a life without any at all. I suspect that’s what drives me. 

I knew now the second week in a row that what I’m hearing on the PodCast is not my FM radio voice and today as my eyes were swollen and nose running along with my throat burning and raw I realized it was allergies and early in my workday made an appointment with Dr. Tong. I’ve been doing radio since I was 16 yrs old and am not happy at all with my performance. Hopefully I can get a shot and get fixed up before the ANGEL show Friday night.I have both Cassie and Bob shooting and it sounds like Adam Becvare is going to join us as well. That and seeing my friends in Electric Revolution open for them again will make for some great conversation on the next show. I haven’t seen Cassie since the Elec Rev show at the Looney Bin back in March. 

One big happy family fucking reunion!

The end of our elaborate plans. The end of everything that stands, The end. No safety or surprise, the end. I’ll never look into your eyes, again.

It boggles my mind when I come to work early mornings and walk across Fountain Square in Evanston that the tables and chairs have sat out in the open all night with no worry of theft. In Chicago they tie them down. There’s a peace about going to and from the office. 

This theater is right by the train station that I take home from work so it worked out well for me to grab dinner at Jimmy Johns (DOUBLE PROVOLONE & AVOCADO cucumber, lettuce, tomato & mayo) and then I walked over to the theater to see the long awaited and much anticipated Avengers ENDGAME

Wednesday after work saw The Avengers Endgame at Century 12 Evanston/CinéArts 6 and XD 

An emotional journey that doesn’t waste a minute. The 3 hour long final chapter of the Avengers franchise lives up to all of the hype and more. I laughed a lot, a whole lot and I shed some tears a few times as well. The digital FX were as good as it gets and that’s something I’ve been very outspoken about, but these were flawless. I’m most likely going back w/ Max to see it in a week or so. 

I spent most of Thursday running running errands and shopping and then I worked on typing out a format and notes for the next MKULTRASOUND PodCast w/ my guest Ty Coon.


Dale arrived around at my place around noon and we drove right up to Reza’s for their Mediterranean/Persian  buffet. It was satisfying though more expensive than the last time we ate there years ago. We sat at the window where there was nobody at first and then they began to sit people, very loud people around us. It went downhill from there. I went to Forever Yogurt after and it topped off a heavy lunch perfectly. 

After lunch we went to Chicago Music Exchange to look for a black Foam Ball-Type Microphone Windscreen so I can get up on my mic for forthcoming shows. They didn’t sell any or have any in stock so then it was off to Guitar Center which worked out because it is not only adjacent to Home Depot where I needed to pick up some pepper and tomato plants but it has free parking. After I found what I was looking for I spoke with a salesman about the Rodecaster Pro which Mark was able to obtain for the show and is shipping it to me this week. He told me they just put on out for display but have none in stock at the time. He seemed impressed when I told him that we had already acquired one. I saw it up and lose and it looks like a wonderful piece of hardware. 

Since we were already in Lincoln Park I stopped to pick up my mail and Dale wanted to go across to Binny’s to buy Anne a case of Taj Mahal Premium Lager. Once back at Casa Diablo we watched TV and then walked to a couple of stores and I picked up some ice cream then I made a Hot Dog dinner at the haus (Uncured Angus Beef and Jumbo Vienna Beef on hogie rolls).

Dale fell asleep watching the Rammstein Paris live DVD. I slept well and we had a big day planned for Saturday. 

Saturday morning we got an early start and by noon were in Skokie/Niles for lunch and to do some shopping. I was thrilled when I saw a Red Robin  and I ordered a double Burnin Love (double Fried jalapeño coins, house-made salsa, Pepper-Jack, lettuce, tomatoes and chipotle mayo on a jalapeño-cornmeal kaiser roll). Dale had endless salad. 

We then went to Half Price Books, Wal Mart for plat pots, Goodwill where I bought my first iron skillet and then went to the Emily Oaks Nature Center in Skokie where I spoke to the rangers and then drove by the Skokie Northshore Sculpture Park which runs for two miles from Dempster Street on the north to Touhy Avenue on the south and displays more than 60 sculptures by artists of local, national and international reputation.

The we were off to Evanston where Dale wanted to go to Wolrd Market and 
Market Fresh Books. I went to Coldstone before heading around the corner to the book store which is where I made a helluva find. We went to the Evanston Goodwill and then next door to the Valli Produce International Fresh Market which is where I though Dales tongue was gonna hit the floor when he saw thew bakery. 

We didn’t get home till 8PM and Dale made dinner which consisted of Iowa Thick Pork Chops from Harter House Meats are perfect for grilling and equally great when oven-baked. An Iowa Chop is cut from the center of the pork, ensuring a thick, perfectly marbled pork chop full of juices and flavor.

I came back to our table after I took this picture and the couple that sat next to us asked me if we were in a band or somethin’. I replied “Or somethin’”

This was by far the best burger I’ve had in years that I didn’t make at home. It was unbelievable and I joined their royalty program so will be going back for sure. The Burnin Love burger is described as topped with fried jalapeño coins, salsa, Pepper-Jack, lettuce, tomatoes and chipotle aioli on a jalapeño-cornmeal kaiser roll. It’s love at first bite. The whole experience was delightful.

This is where the microphones we use for the PodCast are manufactured. 

Does anyone else see the humor in this? They’re are at a Goodwill thrift store.

Fountain Square in Evanston Saturday afternoon

I’ve been walking past Coldstone every weekday since late November and have been craving this. Finally the weather was nice enough I was able to indulge. 

Killer book finds at Half Price Books in Niles and Market Fresh Books in Evanston

Hard Back First Edition of The Professor and the Mad Man

The Professor and the Mad Man softcover for a co worker

Neon Angel memoir by Cherie Currie

2 Bukowski poetry books

Hard Back of my favorite novel The Rum Diary by HST

and HST’s essential contributions to Rolling Stone

 Valli Produce International Fresh Market was an incredible find at the end of our long day out. It’s close enough to work that I’ll be heading back over and over again for sure.

When we walked in the bakery was right there and Dale about shat himself. He loaded up and bought me the chocolate frog and a decadent double chocolate slice of cake. The prices and selection supersedes all Chicago area chains except for Aldi and Wal Mart Neighborhood Markets. 

My very first iron skillet a Goodwill find $12.99

I woke early Sunday and we had coffee and I started  2 Hot Pepper Plants, Ancho Poblano, 1 Mammoth Jalapeno and 1 cherry tomato plant. My plan is to get 2 more pepper plants.


Then it was time for the show. 


We had set the time for noon but Danny and Ty were running late. About an hour late and Bill who was engineering again would be over 3 hours late The show went smooth as I was very prepared and was more familiar with routine than I was a week before. Not to mention I had more sleep and was not stressing at all. This would also lead to my first good Sunday night sleep in over a month. 
Ty wanted to buy some booze and make some drinks but I said not till after the show. Since Bill was running late I agreed to allow her and Danny to go to teh store under the condition that no more than 2 cocktails before taping. It was a nice day and we spent the time waiting outside. I was only upset that the show would run late and I wouldn’t get to do any biking as I knew we were headed for another long week of rain. 

 Ty and AZ outside aftershow

Ty playing AZ’s electric acoustic Ibanez bass named Sylvie B

Midshow w/ Ty Coon

Big Butt Book on the table

Alex and Bill w/ Tanya Tuckers TNT LP


 Alexis Texas gets a shout out on this weeks MKULTRASOUND PodCast.

The Big Butt Book signed by Alexis Texas to AZ..

The show went live Tuesday afternoon while I was at work.Bill had worked till 2AM Monday morning on it and Mark worked on it at his Baton Rouge studio till 3 AM Tuesday. The message I got from him in the morning was simply that “it sounds fucking great”. Mark is a perfectionist so I was excited.  

I rushed home to listen to it and on my commute I had already been getting a lot of response. I knew it’d be tight and it was funny but what I was hearing was not my radio voice. I aim to get that back during the next episode. Everyone else seems happy with it but I’m not. I need to give it a rest on Saturday nights. The content and format is shaping up nicely and I’m about to launch an international media blitz.

Ty was fucking great. I caught one mistake on my end and Mark played the wrong song by Electric Revolution but all in all we’re anything but amateur. 

Thanks Bill, Ty, Danny, and Mark. I love ya all. 


Getting off this carousel, you can do as you please You go to hell, you put my back against the wall Well, I’m not gonna fall on my knees, no, not at all So you’re a saint, I’m a sinner but deuces are wild Better wake up, it’s break up, I ain’t got the time So you can kiss my heart, bye bye

First show is in the can. Waiting or Mark Williams to add his editing touch. Nick Huffman was the perfect first guest. We said retard, dyke, midget and harelip in one episode. Dyke lovingly BTW.

Thanks soooooo much to Danny FukosVas O AgnostosEmily Sifrit (LOVE HER) Nicks mom (the other Nicks Mom) and you for caring. Too Dark just got home so hopefully hear the show tonight.


My Minna

Well, I’ve heard the playback of the complete show and have to give Too Dark props on his editing and vocal skills on the drops. I’m happy with the tone I’ve set and with Nick but need to get my radio voice back. I was sleep depraved, and still am, and was stressed to the max because up until Bill (the engineer) sent me a text early Sunday morning wasn’t 100% the show was going to happen. 

Danny Lee Hill had stayed the night just in case we needed to try to figure this out on our own which had already proven we didn’t get right when we posted a test up on Soundcloud Thursday night. We watched “The Dirt” even thought neither of us like Motley Crue and both loved Hanoi Rocks though me a lot more than most people here in the states. I told him the story of how my first love Minna turned me onto them back in 1984 being that they are from the same country as her. When the movie ended like magic she called me via video chat and I was up late talking w. her as Danny sat next to me and we sang her a few songs as we played or guitars. 

So by the time we recorded the show early Sunday afternoon I was just about as full of nervous energy as I’ve ever been in this format. 

Tuesday morning 4/30/2019

I SLEPT A FULL NIGHT FINALLY! To sleep till 530 AM when my clock is set for 630 AM is good enough for me. I took Mark F’s advice and drank a glass of whiskey and took my meds. An hour later I was out. I woke up around 1 AM to drain the lizard and was so wobbly I could hardly walk and fell right back to sleep. I think PBS is the background helped since I cannot stand that Trump Ass Kisser Michael  Medveds show Sebastian Gorka who served as a Deputy Assistant to the President in the administration U.S. President Donald Trump. Medved was on the Salem Radio Network for 21 years and was replaced because of his criticism of Prez Trump. Freedom of Speech you say? This Gorka guy is a puppet. 


I will be addressing that topic this weekend on MKULTRASOUND.

The days are bright and filled with pain. Enclose me in your gentle rain. The time you ran was too insane. We’ll meet again, we’ll meet again

One Thing Leads to Another

I was physically and mentally drained when I returned home Sunday with more luggage than I’ever taken anywhere. To top it off anxiety set in and no matter how much Trazadone, my OTC and Melatonin I took I could not sleep. Typical Sunday night before my work week, but it was a very untypical extended weekend.

According to a survey by online panel provider Toluna Omnibus, one in four people have trouble falling asleep on Sunday nights. A separate study by Monster.com found that 75 percent of workers experience some version of the Sunday night blues. Plus, on average, most people manage to get six and a half hours of sleep on Sundays—well below the recommended eight hours. What gives?

Welcome to Sunday night insomnia, or as sleep specialist Michael J. Breus, PhD, refers to it: social jet lag. And according to experts, you can mostly blame it on your weekend schedule, which is usually quite different from your usual Monday through Friday routine.

“I think a lot of people don’t realize how shocking our [weekend] habits are to the body,” says Wesley Delbridge, RD, spokesperson for the Academy for Nutrition and Dietetics. For one, “there’s not a lot of physical or mental activity that happens on Sunday,” says Delbridge. “Because you’re not tired from work or moving around, when it comes time to fall asleep, your body stays awake.”

Plus, sleeping in during the weekends throws your entire biological clock (or circadian rhythm) out of whack, just like the “jet lag” you experience when traveling across time zones. Alcohol and caffeine might be culprits, too; that 2 p.m. mug of coffee you chug to recover from a boozy Saturday evening will be in your system for hours afterward, leaving you tossing and turning late into the night.

Needless to say I opted to work from home which was best for everyone. Had I not already had the firm tablet with me it would have been an unpaid day off. 

It was a struggle to post the pix that Max took and Joe Jung sent to me, my new friend from Naperville. I have stories to share but good gawd I think the pix alone tell the untold tale.

TBC – az

Yesterday 4/9/2019 my lunch break in Evanston. Today 36 degrees, a temp drop of 30 degrees and we’re hit with windchill rain and chance of snow. 


Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin’ out the scenery, breakin’ my mind
Do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign?

Half A World Away

Hello again, do you remember me
Am I just a dream or still a memory?
Its been so long now so much time has passed
You’re half a world away and still my love lasts

When I close my eyes I can see your face
And then I look around to all this empty space
I only wonder if you feel the same
Am I still real to you or am I just a name

When you dream am I ever there
To kiss your face and brush your long white hair?
When you close your eyes do you feel my touch?
Are you in my arms again, do I mean this much?

I hate to bring up these things I’m thinking of
Because when I remember us all I feel is love
You’re so far away and were so far apart
Still you’re ever closer in by breaking heart

Will we meet again and then say hello
And how long would that last I guess well never know
My arms reach to you, hold onto my hand
Half a world away am I still your man?

So close your eyes and fall asleep
Maybe in your dream is where you will keep
Memories of days long passed
Of a lover whose love shall forever last

and just like that she Skype called me and we talked till we both fell asleep looking into each others eyes.

and then I woke up to this