April Showers and Insomnia
I’ve recited the following so many times.
“At times like these when enemies
can number more than friends.
A friend indeed is what I need
not someone who pretends.”
So true right now. When I had bucks to spread around everyone was around. When I was taking them to shows, backstage, or around a bunch of beautiful and eager gals, they couldn’t get enough of my time. When I wanted time to chill w/ a woman, people got angry and showed their true colors. I stopped hearing from them, no more AZ stories or benefits, so my friends would either blow me off or just fucking go away.
Things got rough this winter, and some really good friends stood up, offered their friendship and support when I was dealing with heartache, death, health issues and my hours getting cut and me eventually losing my jobs.
These guys KNOW who they are. Unfortunately they are not in the city limits but distance never kept them, very far, in fact they were closer than ever even though they were not here. Even more very recently.
Thanks guys.
We’re going to have a great summer. - az
It’s been a busy couple of weeks and it’s almost hard to sum it all up weeks after, but as usual, I’m going to make a gallant attempt.
After my brother left and went back to Ohio, I dropped up to Wrigleyville North, which we have affectionaly dubbed, the country bar. I went alone and had a pitcher of beer.
Somehow I wandered back into Holiday Club and Norm poured me a couple drinks before I went next to El Palmar for a pitcher of margarita’s which I in my ultimate wisdom was going to drink alone.
I guess it was there, that according to an email I received later that night that I ran into Xtina who I met a few nights prior at Holiday Club where she was bartending her first time. She seemed to have a funny sense of humor and posed w/ Lemont aka The Funderbert Fireman.
So I took my tired self home and after a few of those drunk dials fell asleep.
Monday it was back to the grind, continuing my job search, finally I started getting some freelance research work, by contract, from home. So I called Comcast and had a landline put in. Next thing you know, I’m working from home. Not exactly what I’d choose to do, but in the current economy, why not.
I began networking w/ some former co-workers and discovered after speaking to their higher ups, I come highly recommended. So it is w/ great hope that the market picks back up sooner than later and I’ll be back downtown again.
Things have been tighter than I’ve been used to in 4 years, so I’m really struggling right now, I’ve never been one of those people that believed everything works itself out in the end, because that is completely untrue. I’ve always been a go getter, make things happen, stay passionate and driven and things come around only if you go and get them. So I’m pretty much a pit-bull right now, and I guess I always have been. Ironically my nickname at the last job was Red Bull.
Nobody has ever done it for me, and nobody ever will. And there’s no point ever in waiting around for someone to do it. In all reality most people are not team players, and as much as I’ve tried to work within teams, there are slackers that drag it down, that are dead weight. So with that said, I move on.
Over that week I spent a lot of time communicating w/ Xtina and the following weekend I dropped in to see her at Holiday Club where she impressed me and everyone else by tending that ultra busy backbar alone. I didn’t bother her as she was very busy but I hung out a bit, chatted w Dave Roberts, met Suzanne Shelton a local legend that founded Neo way back in the day.
Dave and I practiced again, w/me a bit tipsy, it went well and the next few days were going to be very busy.
Saturday I was cooking for Xtina and she was going to make drinks. Now as cool as she is, and she is cool, and funny, she also lives on a parallel time schedule opposite from myself. So by the time she arrived Saturday afternoon, I had been drinking Sangria alone for quite a few hours. Basically, I was already in the loop when she arrived 5 hours later than I had planned.
It was pouring down rain and we went for supplies as the steaks were marinating. Now, this is when I was stumped. She was making margaritas, pretty much my favorite drink. Something I like to perfection. She bought OJ, lemonade, apple juice and tequila. I never ever had a margarita like that. I actually stick to the traditional. I’ve had strawberry, mango, prickly pear etc. But prefer traditional.
I was confused, but maybe it was my own doing. Sangrias solo on a rainy Saturday afternoon.
Dinner at Diablo’s
So I cooked, we ate, and we drank and then as I crashed in the guest room, she went out on an all nighter. Ahhhh, the joys of being able to sleep in and be rested enough to do that.
I pulled it together and Dave arrived in the afternoon and we began working on tunes. Then Aly showed up for the first real practice. It went great. SO we worked through a couple tunes, and had fun doing it. Then everyone went their separate ways and I broke and bummed, prepared for another week of looking for work and waiting for my first ever unemployment payment, of my life.
Xtina at Debonair
The following Wednesday I went over to Wicker Parks “Debonair” with Xtina for a burlesque show. There were a handful of girls there I knew but I wasn’t impressed and left after Lady Jack but before Natasha or Sally. Considering the hour and certain CTA busses were no longer running, I was forced to take the blue line all the way downtown to transfer to the red line north to come home. It took for fucking ever.
I came home, sent a few emails, watched Craig Ferguson and tried my damnedest to fall asleep. To little success.
But it was Thursday and there was burlesque at Blue Bayou and I worked on a project all day and was gearing up to go solo to the show. Little did I know it would be the best or at least my most favorite Blue Bayou performance yet. I said hello to my favorite waitress, Elise, who is a dancer that moved here to study dance from Louisiana, so we have that in common. This was oddly the first time I’d seen her since I got back from Baton Rouge.
I ran into Annie’s hubby Keith and the photographer Brian Janes www.bcjphotography.com who is Natasha’s husband and we all took a seat. Another photographer Mike Burke www.michaelburkephoto.com joined us and we all found a good table, with the exception of Keith who plays the role of announcer and we waited for 10 PM and the show to begin.
The performances:
Natasha Minsk Diamonds Are Forever (her own vocals)
Cruel Valentine Out Tonight
Lady Jack The Experiment
Wham Bam Pam Hot Dog
Kitten Kaboodle In Your Wildest Dreams
Red Hot Annie Pit Stop: Out of Gas
Natasha Minsk Good to Mama
Cruel Valentine Supermodel
Wham Bam Pam Sweet Georgia Brown
Lady Jack The Maid
Well I was completely blown away when Brian told me that it was Natasha’s vox on the James Bond theme Diamonds Are Forever. It was just amazing, and again, I was impressed by her work. But the real comic relief came from Keith and Wham Bam Pam. Keith was on fire on the mic, between every number he was like a cross between Don Rickles and Craig Ferguson. He had me almost in tears as he pulled out all the stops and called out anyone that didn’t pay attention. He also called out most of us, by name in the audience that he knew. Just simply a riot.
Wham Bam Pam Hot Dog Dance at Blue Bayou
But the real knee slapper tear jerker was when Wham Bam Pam did her Hot Dog bit. I’m not going to give it away, but she gets the bad girl award for the night. It should have been saved as the show stopper.
BTW she is performing in NYC tonight so congrads Pammy!
I hung out at Blue Bayou for awhile after the show. Spoke w/ Annie and a few of the others and congratulated them on a job well done, and for the first time since I’ve been attending their gigs, I left before them. And I made a bee line for the Holiday Club and took a seat at the bar.
Xtina had picked up an extra night and Shannon was working as well so I figured I’d hang out there. Well it was trouble. Xtina was pouring my tequila hard and heavy. And as she did the weekend before when she earned the title most dangerous girl I know, she kicked my ass.
Holiday Club
I knew I had a big weekend on tap, and as I mentioned recently a lot of people out of my past have been popping back into my life. This weekend proved to be no exception, as Mike Blackley was coming up for a couple nights. But only after I picked up my mail and inside was the new Leonard Cohen, Live In London DVD as well as the CD. My favorite singer, of all time, and one of the best songwriters I know of. And his music, voice and lyrics touch me, deeply. Not to mention for sentimental reasons, I have not been able to listen to his music in months. But now, I was ready, I had been for a couple weeks. Or so I thought.
I made the executive decision to go out and grab some wine and though I had practice that night, a late practice, decided that I’d drink it while watching the concert. And as this show amazed me through every bit of the near 3 hours, it also took me back to a place in my mind, that I had avoided going to in months.
Dave dropped in, we rehearsed and he went out leaving me alone w/ my thoughts and my PC and this concert which I played again.
The next day Mike Blackley arrived w/ two giant jars of pickles, 2 small jars of hot pickled veggies, 2 cases of Miller Lite a case of Miller Chill and some tequila and rum. OH BOY, somethings never change, and I hadn’t seen my old friend in over a year at this point. So we wasted no time in picking up right where we had left off.
Now Mike and I became very best of friends over 16 years ago and we’ve shared many many adventures together. He was w/ me when Shirley Manson had me pulled out of my seat and dedicated songs to me. He was w/ me when we rode in Slash’s van to the AC/DC show where Slash opened and Mike and I got lost under the stage and ended up onstage together, right as AC/DC were coming on. We’ve seen our shared favorite bands together, and met those musicians together. Sisters of Mercy, Love and Rockets, Jesus and Mary Chain etc etc. Also we shared many Garbage concerts together. All of which we spent loads of time behind the scenes w/ the band
Other than the bevy of items he presented to me for ingestion, he also gave me a gift from his 2 daughters Tia and Carmen. It was Weird Harold, which is a very long story. But this “thing” which I dubbed Weird Harold years ago, can be seen in the photos that accompany this bit.
After cracking open a couple of beers, we ordered 2 pizzas from Panino’s one Gyro pizza and one Buffalo Chicken pizza. They were large pans and they were delicious.
Mike and AZ at Holiday Club
I took him around to a few of my favorite neighborhood hangouts, Holiday Club, El Palmar and Wrigleyville North. And we spent hours upon hours playing music and catching up.
AZ and Mike a/ Weird harold at El Palmar
AZ and Weird Harold at El Palmar
El Palmar
AZ and Irish Bob w/ Weird Harold at Wrigleyville North
It was great hanging with Mike again, but as they say, time flies when you’re having fun. Three days had come and goine just like that. And though I was content while he was here I was still sleepless and restless as always, fighting my bout with insomnia without the Rx I need as I do not have the luxury of affording Ambien and I do not have insurance. I spend many hours online and much time on Facebook corresponding with the friends I’ve made from all around the world. In particular Marina from Finland who has been in Russia a lot lately. She recently spent sometime w/ my Norwegian friend in exile as a Swede Mortiis. Furthermore she also interviewed the elusive Sisters of Mercy, so it makes interesting conversation.
We had coffee on the back deck and Mike left Tuesday afternoon after we had a nice long brunch at Ranalli’s. I was going to miss the ol guy, as we never get to spend anytime together like we used to. My work, his work, his wife and kids not to mention the 175 miles between us.
Midnight Dave and Backdoor Aly of Missed Connections
Backdoor Aly and AZ of Missed Connections
Later that night as exhausted as I was, we had rehearsal, the best one yet. Aly and I really got the songs down and they are funny. We laughed all 3 of us all the way through them.
And it was now their time to go. And I was home, alone, it was peaceful, I was exhausted and to add to my insomnia was something or rather someone who snuck back into my mind. Somehow I knew I was not going to get a wink of sleep, and I did not.
I pulled my self out of the bed where I had tossed and turned and was in and out of for hours, and prepared for the project I was just assigned. It went well. And all day I spent in the house and worked on the project and researched somethings on the web.
The last 2 nights have been clear and the moon has been peeking in my back windows which face the lake. Tonight it will be full, and a good time to catch a burlesque show, but I need to remain frugal. I’ve got to count my pennies.
Tomorrow is Good Friday which means nothing to me. Last Easter weekend I spent in Indianapolis w/ my really good friends, and a really bad girlfriend. And honestly, if I had the funds I’d be on a train or rent a car and be on my way back there this weekend. But as things are it is not meant to be.
As I’ve learned, many things are not. Damn, my life IS a Leonard Cohen song!
I have May to look forward to and Community Fest with my friends in New Glarus. In fact May is booking up rather quickly. As long as contracts keep coming in, I have AZ ULTRA Productions to keep me alive. And that’s one person I know I can always count on. The man in the mirror.
I’ve been getting a lot of well wishers to my sleep dilemna and even more inquiries. It is an ailment which I’ve suffered well over half of my life. My body shuts down, but my mind does not.