Talking ’bout Monroe and walking on Snow White, New York’s a go-go, and everything tastes right

Beautiful card from my co workers to mark my 6th year at the firm. They were also nice enough to include at VISA debit gift card. From the art on the card they must know how much I adore Asian pussy. Not that I’ve ever made any secret of it. 

The first question my attorney asked me yesterday during his maiden visit to my home was, “What’s with all the Devil stuff?” without any mention of any of the other stuff.

 “Nobody likes a clown at midnight.” — Stephen King

Hotel where I first met Crispin Glover and spent a long day together at the House of Blues and Music Box Theater

I worked from home all day on Friday and had a brief visit from my attorney and when I finished for the day packed my clown gear and took the train into the Loop. It was a beautiful day and when I arrived at River 21 East bought Ashley and I tickets for the movie “IT” and sat at the bar inside of Lucky Strike and ordered some great grilled buffalo wings and a pint of Dos Equis. Ash was running late and I struck up a conversation with the bartender James about Grindhouse style movies and I slowly transformed into Shakey The Klown. When Ashley arrived I gifted her the presents I had purchased while in Iowa. She was thrilled no less. My clown suit didn’t attract much interest but it was funny. The real fun would begin when the movie began.

Ashley like millions of others suffers from Coulrophobia: A specific fear of clowns has sometimes been discussed in terms of a specific phobia. The term coulrophobia is a neologism coined in the context of informal “-phobia lists”. When we first met over a year ago I used to tease her but on her end it was more like torture. She once commented on a couple of creepy clown figures I have in my living room with, “I don’t know how you sleep with those things in your house.” Recently she claims that I have desensitized her fear being that I admittedly go overboard with such antics.

I never saw my hyperactive Ashley sit so still for so long (2 hrs. 15 min) except when she would jump in her seat. From the scene where Georgie finds a figure dressed as a clown who introduces himself as “Pennywise the Dancing Clown.” The clown severs Georgie’s arm when Georgie reaches into the drain for his boat, then drags him into the sewer. From that moment on I was in tears of laughter during the entire which was very well made. Very well. Maybe for me the best film of 2017 and that includes Logan. The best way to describe her demeanor is petrified. She truly was the definition of the word. 

When the movie ended we went back to Lucky Strike and had another round as well as some free shots from the promo girls working the floor. I met one named Julie who did a couple photos with my alter ego Shakey and told her Julie is my favorite name for a woman as it was my mother’s name. Ashley confirmed this fact. We made plans to meet up the next day when Morgan Russell gets into town from Houston. Morgan who I hadn’t seen since Oct 2014 had some recent difficulties and I agreed to help her out by using my guest room till she gets things in order. Once again Alex to the rescue. 

She said her name is Julie and I told her, “That’s my absolute favorite name for a woman. it was my mother’s name.” and I meant it. I’ve only said that 3 x in my life. 

Chicago Love. 

This was at the end of my alley across from Byron’s this AM. As I walked down my street the second time this morning saying hello to my neighbors I was reminded of when Cari Ganiere paid her first visit and commented how nobody on my street says hello as they pass. I always do. I’ve been residing on this same street for 12 years now.

Then came Ashley and it turned into maybe my most funny night of 2017. 

Saturday morning I got an amazing amount of errands taken care of by 1230. Laundry, banking, dry cleaning and groceries. I could not believe when I finally sat down that it was only noon thirty. On one of my trips out of the house I heard a strange sound over my head and turned around and saw this squirrel on my landlords apartment window. It was so bizarre I had to take some pictures. When I posted them on social meida later they were a hit. Morgan was in flight when I got a message from the Kentucky based model Tana Leggo that she and my friend Nick Huffman would be co-hosting on the Mancow show all week and wanted to meet up for lunch. When I first met Tana some year’s back she came into my office signed a photos I had on my wall and we had a nice long lunch. I decided I would make the following Friday my day off and have her Nick, Corey and whoever else for BBQ.

As I predicted it was becoming a VERY interesting weAkend. 

Sitting on the back deck sipping Deep Eddy’s and listening to LA GUNS I spotted Morgan in the alleyway with all of her belongings in 4 bags. The Gypsy Hippie Chick returns. We had a few drinks and some laughs and Ashely arrived as were inside laughing maniacally t the latest Andrew Dice Clay performance. She did well considering her sense of humor is as vulgar as mine and Morgan’s. She surprised me with a gift of some zero bars in a zip lock bag, all she could find. I was nearly speechless. This was a thoughtful gesture being that I had 2 Zero Bars confiscated from me by TSA in Tampa last December. That’s my Ashley. Before I knew it Ash was craving Jets Pizza(which I’ve only had once before  this year) and Morgan complied and ordered $50 worth for delivery. When we went down to get it from the driver I also found my shipment of Bob’s Pickle Pop’s from Amazon. I discovered this product last summer while at a Drive In in central Illinois and loved it. That same weekend also noticed it was a popular item for sale in the region but I haven’t been able to find them in the Chicagoland area. I attempted to freeze pickles myself but fail to come anywhere close to the real deal. Bob’s Pickle Pops are a vegetable squeezed frozen juice ice pop treat that has NO added sugar and less than 5 calories. The vinegar is known to boost the immune system, ease digestive disorders, and can break down calcium deposits in a person’s joints and are a healthier alternative to sugary pops. Needless to say I was thrilled to be able to order this item online.

So to hell with a healthy diet this weekend thanks to the pizza. Even the wings I had the night before were grilled as opposed to deep fried. Morgan retired to the guest room early while Ashley and I stayed up later watching Rammstein Paris before calling it a night.

Sunday morning was upon us and I attempted to sleep in but rolled out of bed around 730. I put on the coffee, opened the house and when Morgan joined me I spiked the java with some Irish whiskey. A new spin on an old Sunday morning ritual. We sat outside for a while and then watched a few episodes of Better Call Saul before heading out to Pho Viet off of Asia/Argyle for lunch. I of course had the Shredded papaya w. shrimp, pork, onions, basil, cilantro, Vietnamese coriander, lime juice, and roasted peanuts and she a Banh Mi Vietnamese sub. We went to a couple of grocery stores before heading back home. It was a perfect Chicago day.

Back at the ranch I prepped and grilled up some veggie and shrimp skewers and also made some cucumber salad. Keeping up with the cleaning seemed ill fated but we managed. It wouldn’t be completely clean till Monday which I happened to have off. We watched some old video recording of my brother and I from 1992 and crashed. Monday was a lazy day. I grilled some more and we walked up to some shops for a couple of hours and the rest was extremely chill mostly watching Better Call Saul. It was a perfectly lazy day with a light breeze and plenty of sunshine.

An interesting weAkend indeed. 

This is the bed I’m getting next weekend. 12 yrs of good service my current one had endured. I’m going all out on the mattress this time, inspired by Ashley’s. Maybe an end to insomnia. 


3rd X’s the charm Oct 28 Halloween Weekend LA GUNS in Valparaiso IN and a marathon eating session at Quaker Steak & Lube w/ my metal friends. 

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